Comparison: circular rumination vs expansive reflection

The act of comparing ourselves to others purports as a way to motivate us to achieve our best selves; to instill a healthy competition in the comparing party that can bring a higher level of actualization.

Yet, how easy is it to get swept away when comparing into feeling bad about ourselves when we see the accomplishments of others on LinkedIn? Or to feel a pang of guilt when we feel we’re not living our lives to the fullest when we see the incredible fun friends are posting about on social media? Or to be in conversation with acquaintances — or even overhear the conversations of strangers, and to suddenly begin to shrink inward mentally as we realize how people around us all seem to have such fascinating, eclectic, and inspiring stories to tell?

In the path to self-actualization, there is actually a way in which a type of observation of the experiences of others can serve us in a healthy, sensible, and productive manner. It all depends on whether or not you are able to bring a conscious awareness into your observation of others.

Conscious awareness refers to a state of mind where your consciousness is not distracted by the past or future, and is able to focus on the present moment; that is, a state of mind that accepts yourself for who you currently are in the here and now, and is not attempting to…